Wednesday, December 13, 2023

Angels, Electroconvulsive Therapy and Everything in Between


It's been 11.5-ish years since that last entry. 

Life has been a whirlwind as well as a long stretch on a spiritual lawn chair in the sand.  Angels and electroconvulsive therapy didn't have much between them actually, since I told the psychiatry team about the brightly colored angel wings I see on so many people and they prolonged my course of getting zapped because of it.

So very much has happened; my infant Amelie is a half a year out from being a teenager and just wrote a trombone solo for her band's trip to perform at a jazz festival in New Orleans.  I made second human, named her Hazel, and at 9 years old he renamed himself Steve and stopped wearing pink and purple.  Both kids are spitfire brilliant and deeply creative which is tons of fun to parent.

Brian has turned into a marathon runner, and he absolutely loves it.  Our house has become a repository for as many race medals and bibs as there are Harry Potter books (65 countries for lifetime travel destinations, check them out here: www.TakingHarryHome.com.   I've gone to 12 countries bringing Harry Potter books back to where they were bought for me, and had adventures from dog sledding in Alaska to riding a camel in the deserts of northern Senegal.


Far and away my biggest adventure has been getting clean.  I used marijuana daily for 20 years and when COVID hit my habit got out of control.  Finding my homies in a 12-step group was so healing that my life pretty much blossomed again.  My daily involuntary suicidal ideation stopped which has been a massive blessing, and I got a tattoo of my clean date, my personal sign for spirituality and what everyone kept saying to help me get clean -- which is now what I say to my higher power, whose name is Zorla.  She is the love that composes molecules, of which we are composed, and which we compose in turn.


Altogether, life is very good, and I am both very surprised and very happy to still be alive.  Thanks for sticking with me for the adventure.







Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The cognitive science of infant language: What’s a parent to do?

This was the most fun paper of my master's degree.  I combined the advice from many parenting books with evidence from research literature, in hopes of giving parents a solid grasp of how influential our parenting strategies are (or not) and how to change our behavior to more fully stimulate a baby cognitively.

The short of it is this: babies can't learn language from televisions or toys that talk, but if the parent repeats the television or toy, babies can learn it.  Babies learn far faster when parents talk about what the baby is already looking at instead of trying to distract them.  Most importantly, there's no need to feel pressured to do anything differently whatsoever -- your brain and instinctive behavior match your baby's needs naturally in a breathtakingly orchestrated way.

I hope it's as fun to read as it was to write.  Check out the books in the reference section if you want to know more about the neurology of infant cognition.

******


1.0 Introduction

“It’s so annoying when parents try to get their babies to speak bunches of languages and stuff. If your kid’s going to be smart, they’re going to be smart, and if they’re not, they’re not. There’s nothing you can do.” Thus opined a fellow mother upon hearing me speak to my 4-month-old in Spanish. It got me thinking about the influence parenting strategies might, or might not, have on an infant’s linguistic and cognitive ability, and I began to question the motivation behind some of my own behaviors with my infant. The American culture holds linguistic and cognitive achievement as a very high priority, so much so that we tend to believe talking to a preverbal infant constantly is a universal human trait. While it seems absolutely instinctive to us to talk to babies constantly despite the fact that they can’t respond, this is actually a very Western convention, and is no more instinctive than wearing a wedding ring on the left hand (Small, 1998). The behavior reflects our cultural conviction that an individual’s linguistic and cognitive ability can be a key factor in a child’s success in life. This priority is so pervasive that the question “How can I accelerate my child’s cognitive development?” was dubbed “the American Question” by the father of developmental psychology, Jean Piaget (Bringuier, 1980). After thinking about her comment, I decided to soak up such wisdom as is offered by parenting books regarding language, and tie that in to what I have learned from research literature in cognitive psychology. What parental behaviors might such evidence recommend, and, as the fellow mother would question, is there any point attempting to adopt them?

There is no question that a child’s ability to soak up language is breathtakingly complex and blindingly powerful. Researchers have used innovative and insightful nonverbal strategies to test infant language acquisition from many perspectives, including the fields of ethnopediatrics, psychology, neurology and various branches of linguistics. The gestalt of the literature paints a picture of typical babies as brilliantly – and effortlessly – engaged in the feat of mastering systems of spoken and gestural communication.  Surprisingly, unconscious parental behavior often unfolds in neatly orchestrated lockstep with infant needs, as adults subtly modify speech and interactional strategy to scaffold learning. Parental involvement plays a pivotal role in shaping a seedling verbal ability into the grand and convoluted tree it will become, so research literature is replete with implications regarding how parents can interact with a child to maximize that child’s verbal and cognitive skills. This paper provides an overview of ways this research is conducted, what it reveals, what it implies about parenting strategies and how several evidence-based parenting books recommend that knowledge be applied in daily life.

2.0 Methodologies

Before children can speak, they reveal their understanding of their world in different ways. One way is to directly measure brain activity time-locked to the presentation of stimuli, as Molfese et al (1999) did in measuring the linguistic processing of newborns. A more common, less technological method is to measure how an infant perceives and processes her environment is by quantifying habituation to stimuli. An infant is said to habituate to a cue when her interest in it declines, which is measured in different ways for different ages. Some techniques allow a baby to select or maintain a preferred stimulus instead of measuring habituation. Here are a sample of such research methodologies.

2.1 From birth to about 6 months old, babies’ interest in their environment is reflected in their rate of sucking. Pacifiers modified to be data collection devices are used to measure when a baby grows bored of a stimulus or becomes interested in something new. This boundary reflects the categories in a baby’s mind, because something being new requires that it be markedly different from what came before.

2.2 Sucking can also be used to determine how motivated an infant is to maintain an enjoyable stimulus. The data-collection pacifier can “remote control” a video display such that the infant can select which video to see by sucking faster or more slowly. If a baby sucks less than 30 times a minute, the baby might see a woman speaking with a soundtrack that does not match her articulations, if the baby sucks harder than that threshold then the sound track could sync up with the video.

2.3 The strength of the sucking response to interesting stimuli weakens after about 6 months, but closely related methodology called head-turn conditioning can still quantify habituation, as used by Kuhl et al in studies of phonetic perception (Kuhl et al, 2003). The baby will sit on a parent’s lap while looking at an interesting puppet or toy that is kept moving during the repeated presentation of the same stimulus. The infant is trained to turn and look in a different direction every time the stimulus changes in order to see a very attractive toy dance with flashing lights. After being thoroughly trained so she expects the attractive toy to appear only when the cue changes, the baby will continue to watch the moving puppet until she perceives a new category boundary, at which point she turns her head to look for the attractive toy.

2.4 The pacifier-as-remote-control scenario has a parallel at this stage too; a baby can actively change a sound recording (rather than responding to a change in it) by turning her head. One study showed that babies will turn their heads to hear a woman speaking motherese in any language rather than adult-oriented speech in the baby’s primary language (Gopnik et al, 1999).

2.5 Puppets are helpful when investigating the cognitive processes of toddlers who can verbalize their thoughts but only vaguely. These are useful in experiments where there is a dissociation between what a toddler knows implicitly and what a toddler explicitly says, as in Low’s investigations on false-belief understanding (2010). A toddler watching puppets interact will look at certain things depending on her understanding of the situations being represented. This reveals what the toddler thinks different “people” understand when one person has witnessed an event the other puppet did not “see”.

3.0 Findings: Linguistic and cognitive development from birth to parenting

It’s hard to know where to begin in summing up research conclusions about infant language acquisition, but we’ll start with the physiological neurolinguistic development of newborns and proceed through to evidence regarding the impact of caregiver interaction.

What do we bring onto the stage of life? At birth we have more brain cells than at any other time of life; by some estimates nearly half (80 of 200 billion) will have died by the age of 1 (Sunderland, 2006). This is by no means the tragedy it sounds, because the neural proliferation of birth is to cognition what the broad-spectrum static of white noise is to music. The first year of life provides a bonsai-like pruning of brain cells, allowing the static to resolve into symphony by removing, not adding, frequencies of activation. Whether connections abound at this time seems in dispute, some authors claiming the proliferation of newborn neural matter is very unconnected, with individual neurons blindly firing without triggering connections (Sunderland, 2006) while others claim the exact opposite extreme, that the associations between brain cells are far, far more redundant than at any other point in life (Gopnik, 1999). The implications for a newborn’s subjective experience of consciousness are striking, since neural activation absent connections would likely be experienced as senseless random perceptions, but heavily redundant interconnectivity between brain cells would cause a near-complete synesthesia of sensations that are experienced distinctly by adults. Recent research backs up the hyperconnectivity hypothesis, finding that shapes influence color preferences in 2 and 3 month olds but not in 8-monthold infants or adults (Wagner and Dobkins, 2011). Arbitrary linking of perceptual modalities decreases as infants grow older, refining the perceptual conflagration into the more analyzable data stream adults navigate as consciousness.

The linguistic facet of such cognitive sculpting comes on stage immediately, even before time allows experiential diminution of associations. Amazingly, the differences in how a newborn’s brain processes sounds are significantly predictive of reading difficulties at the age of 7. Studies analyzing brainwaves of newborns via event-related potentials have found that the more finely voices are processed (through brainwaves reflective of linguistic activation), the less likely the baby is to have reading difficulties years later (Molfese et al, 1999). The neurological equipment with which we come to the game has a strong impact on the ease with which we will develop linguistic ability, but the richness of our environment can trump our original aptitude – in a good way or a bad one.

It does this via the bonsai-like neural pruning during the first year. This is led by a re-weighting of connections based on how often environmental stimuli link brain activity in different areas. A major finding that overturned expectations of experts in the field was that of infant phonetic discrimination, whose development directly reflects the frequency of an infant’s exposure to speech sounds.  Researchers long believed that babies had to learn to hear distinctions in sounds, that hearing reflected vision in beginning fuzzy and only becoming distinct with exposure to language (Gopnik, 1999). In fact babies begin as “citizens of the world” (Kuhl,2003), capable of differentiating sounds in all languages the way dogs can. Toward the end of the first year, between 6 and 12 months, a specialization occurs, and the ability to discriminate foreign-language sounds sharply declines. Instead of hearing every articulatory variation as a distinct sound, babies begin to perceive a spectrum of sounds categorically. Sounds that trigger contrastive meaning (phonemes) in the language(s) of a baby’s environment receive special status as prototypes, until phoneme boundaries modify perception categorically. A frequency heuristic seems to be at work, building up prototypes and having similar stimuli trigger categorical recognition.

Patricia Kuhl found that if a baby is consistently exposed to a foreign language at this point, whatever she has heard before, then her brain will maintain the distinctions of the sounds in that language. She exposed 9 month old infants to 12 sessions of foreign languages, each 25 minutes long, over a one month period. Amazingly, such brief exposure served to preserve discriminatory categorical perception in non-native speech sounds, but only if the exposure occurs with a live tutor. Watching people talk on television or listening to CDs has no effect (Kuhl, 2003).

This differential influence of the source of language shows up in other studies as well. A sound has to come from a mouth instead of any sort of technological device in order for an infant to consider it a candidate for a label. Both words and animal noises were subject to the linguistic process of mutual exclusivity in the behavior of 20-month-olds, but only when they were spoken by a researcher in the room rather than a hand-held noisemaker (Brojde and Colunga).

Together these imply two things, to my thinking: there’s some linguistic “social brain” switch that has to be turned on in order for an infant to process sound as language. This leads to the conclusion that 2) all of the stuffed animals that say “Hola! Como estas?” and all the Baby Einstein-genre videos purporting to teach infants foreign languages are actually not being processed as language by babies at all. An implication for parental behavior becomes obvious here: if parents were to repeat the words the adult hears from the toy or video to which they are exposing their little one, the baby would then process it as language. The electric voice won’t be heard as a voice by the infant, but if the parent echoes it in person, the baby will understand it not as environmentally-generated noise but as meaningful socially relevant communication. I apply this by trying to sign along with Singing Time videos designed for children when my 10-month-old Amelie and I watch them. Very often she focuses on the movement of my hands with the same minute-seeming precision she uses on occasion to watch my lips as I speak.

Sign language is an interesting area of dispute in regards to what effects it has on infant linguistic development. The formal research literature has generally found it to be not at all as empirically beneficial as parents are told it is (Keister and Keister, 2009). For the most part such claims are commercially oriented, not backed by solid research, and thought by many to be manipulative, encouraging parents to pay money for programs that actually just formalize the gestural communication all preverbal infants establish with their parents. It is really more a nominative label-oriented gestural code, lacking the rich special syntax unique to manual languages (Sacks, 1989).

While the benefits of teaching an infant codified sign language have not been scientifically verified as such, an infant’s ability to communicate does have the benefit of lowering frustration by being able to signal the cause of discontent (Keister and Keister, 2009). The primary benefit however is the environmental focus on rich interactive connection. The sort of parental interaction that goes along with familial efforts to establish early communication is itself likely to benefit an infant’s cognitive development. When parents engage in intensive sustained collaborative focus with an infant, it seems to throw the social switch that tells a baby’s brain that environmental information is important. When an adult pays attention for a long time to the same thing the baby is paying attention to and elaborates verbally on the object of the baby’s focus, the baby’s vocabulary acquisition is accelerated. A study of deaf and hearing children with deaf and hearing mothers showed that when mothers comment on an object the child is already paying attention to, when they elaborate on jointly sustained attention, the child is more likely to learn words. When we pay attention to something with a baby, the baby’s brain gets ready to accept a sound or a symbol as a label for the object. To me it makes sense that beginning the signifier/signified connection earlier would open the door further for later vocabulary acquisition, and understanding the pragmatics of turn-taking would help an infant develop interpersonal sensitivity.

Whether using a visual or spoken communicative system, the language in which we encode an event impacts the details we are most likely to remember. In Spanish, the agent of an unintentional event (dropping) is not linguistically coded and can be forgotten (Fausey & Boroditsky, 2010). Language acts like a container into which we drop an idea, and the form of the container shapes our recall of the idea. Oliver Sacks in Seeing Voices reports on data from interviews with adults who, due to congenital deafness and late acquisition of language, and he claims that the ability to predicate linguistically is so essential to our cognition that with out language we exist in a continuous river of timeless now. Such adults often remember a stream of identity, with no ability to remember that yesterday the sun was shining, no way to form abstractions and learn. Studies with adults show that the ability to make finer distinctions (as in having been taught more detailed bird-species classification) allows larger distinctions to be made more easily, possibly because the more adept we become at thinking of a descriptor as independent of the described (being able to think of “red” instead of “the red car”) the more powerfully we can manipulate abstraction. If Sacks’ conclusions are accurate, language necessarily underscores the logical and analytical ability that makes us most human, because in its absence we cannot hold information long enough to process it or deduce implications. This is absolutely fascinating because it indicates directly that without other humans, we fail to become truly human ourselves; interpersonal interaction is literally a mandatory part of realizing the genetic aptitude afforded by the singular evolution of our species. In a very real sense we are a single organism, necessary to each other in order to manifest the complete richness of our abilities. Interpersonal interaction is encoded in our genes, and we require a community to become fully ourselves.

This community finds its first embodiment as family and actually has a very directive impact on the linguistic and cognitive sculpting of a child’s mind. The good news is that families do this almost entirely unconsciously. Caregivers modify linguistic forms in many ways to make learning the language easier. We exaggerate the differences in phonemes, making the prototype/histogram project easier; we use engaging and sweeping changes of prosody so the child can pay attention longer (Gopnik, 1999). Caregivers also modify the complexity of sentences in order to help a child first master a new word, using it in more and more simple situations right before a baby gets it and then making the language complex again (Roy, 2011). Tight feedback systems must dictate caregiver speech habits unconsciously to cater to the needs of the burgeoning speaker. So much of this adult language modification is instinctively unintentional that Gopnik (1999) concludes we have no need of expert advice, only time to do what we naturally do as we interact with children.

Such untrained interaction has been found to markedly influence cognitive development in infants, so much so that maternal behavior with a 6-month-old has been found in several studies to predict performance on intelligence assessments given when the same child is 4 years old (Bornstein, 1985). Didactic parental activities are extremely influential in promoting (or, it may follow, inhibiting) the linguistic and cognitive achievement of their children. The maternal habits that proved most  efficacious in producing advanced linguistic ability were founded (as previously mentioned studies would imply) on intensive sustained attention. The most powerful way to help an infant develop advanced linguistic skills is to frequently encourage them to pay attention to properties, objects and events in the home environment. Such attentional allocation is shared between infant and parent, awakening the social processing of the brain, expanding the labels available for manipulation and by so doing honing an infant’s ability to abstract a trait from the object it describes. In such a way we can empower our children to think clearly and specifically, to use language as a multi-faceted tool in analyzing the environment and making appropriate decisions based on available information.

4.0 Conclusion

Was my fellow mother right in claiming that an individual’s linguistic and cognitive ability are set in stone from the moment of birth? Absolutely not: scientific literature is replete with data contradicting that stance, and there is in fact very much we can do. Every experience from the moment of birth influences the trajectory of neural pruning, and the early developmental paths parents set for their infants may heavily influence what paths are available to that child later in life (Gopnik, 1999).

However, that frustrated mother was reacting understandably to inappropriate societal pressure regarding overextension for the linguistic and cognitive benefit of a baby. Her implication that there is no fundamental need to go out of our way to produce a rich linguistic environment for a child is true, because we as parents have co-evolved with babies, and a standard loving parent’s unconscious interactional strategies will equip a healthy infant with strong linguistic and cognitive ability. All the technology marketed to parents as enhancing an infant’s wellbeing does so without the slightest shred of supporting evidence that the claims are true. Part of the usefulness of science is that it inoculates us against pseudo-science, and learning may best be accelerated by encouraging an involved, attentive, happy baby to interact with the people she loves (Gopnik, 1999).

What has all of this information had on my choices as a parent and my understanding of my own  behavior? I am now very relaxed and confident that my instinctive linguistic style is perfect for my child. Instead of systematically creating and repeating situations that would allow her to link the same sound with the same object as a strategy of encouraging early word recognition, I speak to her nearly every day in Spanish, French, English, Arapaho and American Sign Language. I do it not because I am vested in her development of extreme linguistic ability or cognitive abstraction; I find it likely that such inconsistent verbal data will throw off her histogram of phoneme frequency, and my utter lack of consistent routine may well temporarily impede her mapping of signifier to signified. The fact that we listen to recordings of languages instead of music in my house is no doubt changing in some way how her brain will process music, perhaps indicating that an intentional focus on musical training at a later age will be wise.

After all the reflection on the impact my parenting will have on her cognition, my ultimate conclusion is this: so what? There is no reason whatsoever to be worried or feel pressured about the impact my behavior will have on Amelie’s cognitive and linguistic abilities, and I am not motivated (at least not consciously) by any desire to produce a certain outcome, which means I will not be disappointed if her verbal ability proves sub-par. I do all of this because it’s fun, every word of it, beginning with the studying of Italian for hours every day during the last trimester of pregnancy and continuing through our most recent joint endeavor of home-schooling a 3-year-old in French one day a week. It’s all a hobby, all an experiment whose results can only be interesting, only delightful, only thought-provoking. And in any case, last week at the age of 10 months she stopped crying in her car seat mid-wail when she heard the Italian lessons I repeated nine zillion times in the third trimester of pregnancy. Whatever impact my behavior has on her future, it’s wonderfully fulfilling to play the linguistic game to its fullest now.

5.0 Bibliography


Brojde and Colunga. Out of the Mouths of Babes: The effect of source on 20-month-olds' Use of Mutual Exclusivity. Department of Psychology, University of Colorado.

Bornstein, M. H. "How Infant and Mother Jointly Contribute to Developing Cognitive Competence in the Child." Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences 82.21 (1985): 7470-473.

Bringuier, Jean-Claude. "Conversations with Jean Piaget." Society 17.3 (1980): 56-61.

Fausey, Caitlin M., and Lera Boroditsky. "Who Dunnit? Cross-linguistic Differences in Eye-witness Memory." Psychonomic Bulletin & Review 18.1 (2011): 150-57.

Gopnik, Alison, Andrew N. Meltzoff, and Patricia K. Kuhl. The Scientist in the Crib: Minds, Brains, and How Children Learn. New York: William Morrow &, 1999.

Kiester, Sally, and Edwin Kiester. The Secret Language of Babies: The Body Language of Little  Bodies. London: New Burlington, 2009.

Kuhl, P. K. "Foreign-language Experience in Infancy: Effects of Short-term Exposure and Social Interaction on Phonetic Learning." Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences 100.15 (2003): 9096-101.

Low, Jason. "Preschoolers’ Implicit and Explicit False-Belief Understanding: Relations With Complex Syntactical Mastery." Child Development 81.2 (2010): 597-615.

Molfese, Dennis L., Victoria J. Molfese, and Kimberly A. Espy. "The Predictive Use of Event-Related Potentials in Language Development and the Treatment of Language Disorders." Developmental Neuropsychology 16.3 (1999): 373-77.

Roy, Deb (2011). TED talk: The Birth of a Word.
http://www.ted.com/talk/deb_roy_the_birth_of_a_word.html

Sacks, Oliver W. Seeing Voices: A Journey into the World of the Deaf. Berkeley: University of California, 1989.

Small, Meredith F. Our Babies, Ourselves: How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Parent. New York: Anchor, 1998.

Sunderland, Margot. The Science of Parenting: How Today's Brain Research Can Help You Raise Happy, Emotionally Balanced Children. New York, NY: Dorling Kindersley, 2006.

Wagner, K., and K. R. Dobkins. "Synaesthetic Associations Decrease During Infancy." Psychological Science 22.8 (2011): 1067-072.

Saturday, November 07, 2009

Romancing the Stone: on the joys of being an intern

I scored an internship with Rosetta Stone’s Endangered Language Program at their global headquarters in Harrisonburg, VA, instead of going to grad school this semester. It’s weirdly relaxing. I work full time and finished the 6-month research project that got me my master’s degree a couple of weeks after I got here, and it is still so, so much less stressful than going to class. The people here are precisely my vibe of crazy. It’s truly wonderful.

I designed my PhD from the beginning so that Rosetta Stone would hire me when I finish it, that or I’ll be able to write my own grants to do primary endangered language documentation with tribes that really need it – a choice I’ll make when I’m done, depending on how important paychecks are at that point in my life. Since Rosetta Stone makes software that teaches language, my degree is joint/double in Linguistics and Cognitive Science, focusing on user-centered pedagogical linguistic interface design – how to design language-teaching software specifically for a certain demographic (in my case, native communities; in Rosetta Stone's case, people who can afford it).

The thing is, I’m half-way through the PhD, but I’m a lot more than half-way to working for Rosetta Stone. And it’s fun here – terribly fun. The work is fascinating, since they’ve taught me to constructively critique the lessons as they design them. It means I play, all the time – I get paid to learn languages, and to think and watch very closely to catch aberrations they don’t want, that might make the game less efficient or less fun. It’s strange to me that working in industry is so fun, since I come from academia, where industry is generally considered rushed and stressful. Not remotely, man; not here… just more lucrative.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Controvertial Conclusions: to Abort or not to Abort?

My little brother Kelson has been asked to write an objective analysis of abortion for one of his 10th grade classes, very likely Language Arts, in response to a satirical essay by Somebody Schwigg around 1800 that said no we shouldn't abort them, we should give birth, feed them well for a year, skin them, use the meat to feed the hungry, and turn the skins into wallets and lampshades. Writing an unbiased, unemotional response to that sounded challenging. What follows is the email I wrote him to that end, my logic, and here's my conclusion: if you think the U.S. Legal System's assessment of the environment more closely reflects the Will of God (religion) or more perfectly maximizes the utalitarian benefit of the society in which it occurs (science) than does the assessment of the pregnant mother, then abortion should be illegal in all cases not approved of by the U.S. Legal System. If you think the mother's assessment does a better job, then abortion should be legal in all cases, point blank.

Here's why.
**
You said that guy's name was Schwigg? 1798 or something, eating babies?

Have you seen the Southpark where Cartman sells aborted fetuses so Superman can eat them and get Super again? Harvesting stem cells after fertilization is seen by the political right in this country (i.e. my father) as equivalent to skinning babies, eating them since the population needs it, and making (useful) wallets etc. with their skin. Not having read Schwigg's satire, I can't say from your description whether he suggested that stuff with enough sarcasm to put his stand as for or against abortion. My guess would be against -- but actually the first time I wrote that sentence I wrote for, so I'm not exactuly sure.

My personal stand -- which is irrelevant to your essay, but may provide enough food for thought for you to see a perspective sufficiently objective to include -- is that the difference between to Murder and to Kill lies not in the act of ending cellular respiration (though stem cell removal actually MUST preserve cellular 'aliveness' to work) but rather in the human-like or non-human-like nature of the thing whose life is being ended, in conjunction with the societal benefit of ending the life. Does a cat murder a mouse? No; in my opinion, a cat can only kill a mouse. Does a human murder a mouse? No; a mouse can only be killed. Does a human murder a human? Depends, in my opinion, on the intention of the person ending the life of another person. Capitol punishment stands any chance whatsoever of being morally admirable solely on the societal conviction that a person can be so morally fucked up that it is not murder to end their life; it is morally justifiable by the utalitarian benefit to society of the cessation of the criminal's presence. If the criminal is on death row for ending the life of another human (never a dog, a mouse, or a monkey) then some judge decided the ending of life was "manslaughter" or "murder" as opposed to "justifiable self-defense," which is legally known in Colorado as the Make My Day Law (which you can google for facts if you find it appropriate). One of the ten commandments is Do Not Murder; in the old testament God commanded the Israelites to attack a village and kill every man, woman and child; God cannot violate His own commandments. According to my father, Christianity (and Christians who've bothered to think about this) effectively conclude that God disapproves of murder, but condones "killing", at least when He approves (whatever the hell that means, usually defined functionally as agreeing with whatever extremist faction, of whatever religion, race, or political standing, is currently telling themselves they are doing the Will of God).

My personal faith is composed of evidence strong enough to tilt my logical conclusion one direction more than the other (codified as the professional pursuit of science). In the case of abortion, and in most other cases, the strongest piece of evidence for me is utalitarian value: which choice does the most good for the most different people in the most different ways. My understanding is that the joining of monocellular gametes (known as a sperm and an ovum, an egg) do not fit the definition of "human" until they have enough cerebral cortex to reflect neural activation that matches what science has identified as corresponding systematically to our subjective experience of "consciousness", so the harvesting of stem cells is not murder, and given that they can literally cure neurological disorders like Parkinsons, the utalitarian best choice is to harvest them, despite the fact that choosing not to harvest them would lead to the same blob of cellular tissue eventually developing enough brain matter to be conscious and therefore considered a human (a fetus). If the blob of cells has passed that line and has neural activation -- which is around the same time as a detectable heartbeat, I think, some time after the tail and the gills transform into lungs and a spinal cord -- then it falls into the same category as whether it is murder or not to execute a convicted serial murderer on deathrow: which choice most benefits the society in which the choice is being made? Most women who opt for abortions do so not only for their own wellbeing (which the Christian Right would consider selfish enough to qualify abortion as murder) but largely because they deeply believe that their environment or their own personal maturity are such that they would do a "bad job" mothering and the child would suffer. In my opinion, those women are choosing to protect their children by postponing reproduction -- which results in the survival only of those fetuses with a good chance of being emotionally healthy, societally productive, and possibly even loving, generous, and kind adults. Even Christian Right extremists most often agree that cases of rape, incest, and harm to the mother's life justify abortion -- they are also utalitarian, we just disagree about which path leads to the most societal benefit.

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Conclusions: Fourier analysis and the World at Large

January 10th, 2009, Travel Diary

Plane #2, Sao Paulo a LAX

Brazil cultivates kindness like no other country I can remember being in. Every country has its specialty, it seems to me – the calming forests and beautiful waterfalls, the lush living gentleness, have fostered sensitivity and caring. In Germany the dark winters and cold weather have fostered efficiency in meeting needs; the cars go fast, the trains are sleek and smooth, the subways are calm, and the people are subdued and gentle. In France indulgence is unquestionably a virtue of highest regard – the food is delicious, the museums abound with history and talent, and the Moulin-rouge-style passion is both exquisite and infamous. Ghana celebrates the primal rhythms of human nature with music, dance, and clothing so colorful it seems to shine with joy – as does their passionate and joyful vibe of Christianity. Britain’s strong patriarchal heritage is evident not only in its history but in its profound respect for everyone’s right to enjoy the inheritance of all cultures – the British museum is gorgeous, and not only is it free, it’s the only museum I remember that lets you not only touch many precious relics but even photograph them all. Wales treasures the well-being of its populace over material appearances, as did their passionate druid ancestors whose culture of passion and poetry survives in jousting festivals and the annual Eistedfodd. Mexico specializes not only in family but in generosity as well; wedding celebrations are virtuallyt conflagrations of joyous affection, but those who provide the income are willing to leave the world they cherish for one they know full well is hostile to outsiders so they can find

Plane # - ?

**Peace.

Outside the window the world floats by, fluffy piles of cumulous clouds below, soft swaths of blue and grey stretching above. The sound of a movie whispers from the headphones of the passenger beside me; the screen of his seat, turned toward me since I lowered my windowshade when I saw him blocking the light with his hand, has subtitles in Japanese and English with a soundtrack in Brazilian. I love this airline, but as I awaken to the validity of my own truth it is becoming clearer that I love not only all ways of traveling but also all travelers, all destinations, and perhaps, at least in retrospect, all travels.

The truth is trippy, but the way is simple, and the light is the foundation of everything we can see and touch – but by no means is it the crux of who we are. From the cohesion of atomic particles to the amplification of electromagnetic power – from the peace in a child’s eyes to the tingling thrill of a deeply moving symphony, the energy that makes order from chaos follows the same fundamental principles: tension is cold, arousal is hot, and symmetry is the balance of it all. How could it not be? Science does describe the truth; belief does empower it; ignorance, or at least the willingness to relax and re-focus, does define what we perceive. The culture of our origin seeds our truth; the nature of our destination defines its trajectory; our willingness and abi8lity to change our perspectives shape our growth – but in the end the result is invariable: peace.

A child across the plane from me is screeching at a pitch whose frequency, whose wavelength, causes my stomach to tighten – but the child’s crying is not causing my discomfort. My brain is, not hers. My nervous system has been calibrated by the myriad details of my life to respond to the precise sound of her wailing with annoyance – tension, excessive activation, negative emotion – but if I breathe, relax, and pay attention to the tenor of the voice rather than the fist it curls in my stomach, the tension dissipates into compassion, the unpleasant arousal into sympathy, my own suffering into understanding. If I focus on the external stimulus instead of my internal reaction to it, her screeching melts into an emotion I empathize with very well: frustration. In the absence of words, her neuronal design clenches her throat with the same grip that dictates nearly all human interaction: she says what she feels, speaks her truth. If I focus on her emotion instead of mine, the exquisite tuning of the human perceptual systems correctly reinterprets my annoyance as her pain, not mine. Then my tension melts into sympathy, my clenching discomfort into understanding, my angry dislike of the dissonance into a very real compassion.

It is not the child’s crying that forces me to be uncomfortable, it is just my nervous system’s response to her absolutely honest, wholeheartedly innocent way of expressing her own reaction to her experience of the world. If I redirect my focus to her experience rather than mine, my brain responds by mirroring her suffering with a harmless trace of my own. Instead of tension, I tune in to the precise wavelength of her pain – and I feel in my gut that she is not suffering at all. She is frustrated that the world, her immediate environments, is not providing what she strongly feels she deserves to be given. There is dissonance between her desires and her immediate experience, but she is not suffering. If I allow my perception – or truly my own reaction to her perception – to override how innately I empathize with it, my emotion reflects hers rather than mirroring it. As soon as her mother’s behavior shows she is listening, shows the child’s mind that she is understood, she stops crying – the inequity of valence dissolves, her out-of-kilter emotion resolves into the peace of knowing she is understood, and she stops screeching (which she actually did about halfway through this sentence). Until her mother’s body really does come in line with the child’s nervous arousal – for as long as she hears frustration or anger in the mother’s voice instead of the helpless discomfort felt by the child herself – the dissonance will amplify, and whatever wavelength most provokes her mother’s system to respond with sympathy is the wavelength to which the baby’s voice will migrate. With enough arousal, a perfect mirror-mind will gravitate to sympathy. A mind springing from a non-mirror nervous system will respond with whatever emotion is triggered within it. So long as the person on the receiving end is focusing on the message rather than its source or its destination, arousal of the sympathetic nervous system (tension) will trigger mirror neurons in the listener’s brain to recreate the source intension: which is felt by the mother as the suffering it is, so the child’s mind perceives that it has been met with understanding. When the child’s arousal is met with the mother’s empathy, the dissonant wavelengths do what dissonant wavelengths do across the spectrum: they resolve into harmony, and the discomfort dissipates. Pain met with empathy resolves into peace; heat met with cold resolves into the temperature of its equilibrium; agitation joined to its exact opposing frequency returns to baseline. As soon as the mother shows the baby she understands – as soon as their perceptual systems come into harmony, the frustration ceases and both parties fall silent.

The only pain is in the message. Discomfort is the invariable response to discomfort, in exact and perfect ratio to the mismatch, the misunderstanding. Great passion m et with great gentleness resolve into flawless kindness. Passion met with poassion amplifies the nervous reaction until the dissonant wavelengths resolve, which they invariably do. A flat-line apathetic numbness looks exactly the same spectrally as does perfect harmony. They look like peace. They feel like understanding. They sound like they were exquisitely designed to get along. They were.

My annoyance at the squeal results directly from my focus on the endpoints rather than the message, the emotional correlate of the neural mismatch in activation; if I redirect my attention to the message itself, I naturally perceive and respond appropriately.

Pain results from focusing on the source, the speaker, or its destination, the listener. If we pay attention before we respond, we empathize, and we experience neither fear nor anger. If we focus on the message instead of our reaction, we have no biological option but understanding. Passion plus passion equals peace. Fourier analysis can clarify every misunderstanding.

Empathy manifests as widened eyes; so does attraction; so does what we call love. Fear triggers contraction of pupils; I suspect anger does the same. Pupils respond to pupils like mirrors; dilation evokes contraction until the pupils reflect each other perfectly, which is when we feel understood, when we feel safe, when we feel loved.

So why can’t we just get along? We can; we eventually have no choice. Eventually we see eye to eye, no matter how convoluted or intense the process may be. Fear and anger, joy and mourning, agony and empathy reflect each other so perfectly that they are literally predestined by physics to come to terms with each other. Pain, discomfort, is just misperception. Focus on the message and no damage can possibly be done.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

Choices for the New Year

This new year finds me at the spiritual retreat of John of God, a very loving and gentle way to begin again. I would translate the poem below but it loses its... the resonance of its soul in translation. Suffice to say my trajectory is intentionally different this evening from what it was the night before, and my wish for you is that you also find the peace so pervasive here.

Cachoeira de espíritu
é la vida.
A luz de bondade brilla
tras as gotas des olhos.
O medo revolva nos espacios secretos,
fazendo vortexa de enojamento i desesperação.

Não eligo oscuridade.
Agora saio do crepusculo das dudas.
A minha alma se faz parte
de harmonia
entre a agua vital
i os ventos esperações.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Diamonds, Waterfalls, and sleeping with Santa

This blog has missed far more than I can update in one entry. Since the last entry in London in June, many adventures have befallen me, mostly colorful and intense, hosteling through Wales and then getting to know my loving, open-hearted new family while learning Arapaho up on Wind River Reservation. We got a new puppy and named him Baxter, then the semester's computer programming classes were very difficult and stressful. It ended up not mattering; my mother died, my wonderful irreplaceable mother died, and the world ground to a halt anyway. Or mine did.

But time keeps passing anyway. Two years ago my friend Sarah (Banana from our time in Ghana) and I planned to go to out of the country for at least a week together every two years until we're forty. The first place we planned on was Brazil, because my old friend Ricardo owns a house in a little town here, out in the middle of the country surrounded by green forests and waterfalls where diamondhunters and goldminers hunted treasure hundreds of years ago. I started saving then and the trip was scheduled for this Christmas -- so despite my mother's death and the economic straits with which we're all so familiar now, we went on this trip anyway. I flew out of DIA on Christmas Eve and passed the night sleeping high over the earth somewhere, no doubt ever so close to Santa. Now I write from my amply-stickered laptop in a cybercafe in the little town of Pirenopolis, 3 hours south of Brasilia, right smack in the middle of the country, in mystically beautiful cobblestone hide-away no other non-Brazilian tourists seem to have discovered. The entry that follows was written last night in my friend Ricardo's ancient little house. More to follow...

_

Outside my window dusk is falling on the moss-covered garden wall. Brazilian voices with prosody as rolling as the countryside filter through the house. Behind me on the half-lit cement floor, Banana is stretching slowly and silently. Today was perfect.

Her name is Luciana, I think, and she led us to a waterfall she loves here. The dark curls of her hair, her dark skin and her willowy movements embody the beauty these forests are famous for. She and her well-traveled friends Daniela and Luiz came over to Ricardo’s house to visit with Bianca, and within half an hour I was thrilled to hear them invite us to a chapoiera, a waterfall. We walked on slate stone sidewalks through the whole town, out to the Bom Fim barrio on the edge of a sea of green, rapt the entire time in conversation. Our new friends are around our age and of similar political and interpersonal mindset, very good at listening, mostly able to understand and speak English and very kind. We spent the whole day together, sliding through languages and musings alike.

After stopping for water (none for me) at Luciana’s house, we walked some 20 minutes down a paved road that ribboned over the hills, then turned off on an unpaved one with trees overhanging it and red dirt under broken white rock. A quarry stands in stark contrast to the forests some short ways outside of Pirenopolis, and it is obvious why this stone is popular: it glistens like water, shot throughout with sparkling flakes of metal that catch the sun in silver and gold. After we hiked through a vine-tangled stretch of jungle very reminiscent of Hawaii, the river to our right opened up into pools and waterfalls, framed in this same breathtaking rock. We all stripped down to our bathingsuits and waded into the flow since it was too shallow to jump in the part of the river where we were. After an hour of loafing about in the cool water and climbing the mossy boulders in the river, it began to rain steadily, and we turned to head home. The sun shone and the day was pleasantly warm; much of my body stings as I write, kissed into red by sunburn earned with my forgetfulness. They do sell sunscreen here, I just put off buying any until it was too late. Tomorrow.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Architecture, Art, and the Exhaustingly Endangered

The University of London's School for Oriental and African Studies, SOAS, has an Endangered Language Documentation Programme that funds linguists doing research on disappearing languages all over the globe. Oddly enough, it is this institution -- an English one centered on Asia and Africa -- that will fund our work on Arapaho, so they flew both me and my advisor Andy to London for a week of (brutally dense) training. It's a very encouraging way to start my PhD -- professionally funded international travel -- but until today my exposure to the country was limited to a conference room. The training in microphone techniques, linguistic documentation software, strategies of elicitation (getting people to say what you want in a natural way, which almost always means they can't realize you want them to say it) -- all that has been fascinating and invaluable, but since 15 linguists from around the world have 6 days to understand everything, the stress level and grumpiness has been getting difficult to stomach. Today was our one day off, but I'm staying three days extra to take a train to Wales and add an automatically validated Harry Potter (in Welsh) to my collection.
The day was wonderfully refreshing. I chose two spots to see, and to think about: St. Paul's Cathedral and the crypts below it, then the Tower of London (which is really more like a castle historically used as a prison complex). The rose garden around the cathedral was gorgeous; the wrought-iron spikes atop the boundary fence certainly looked like a sufficient deterrent. The cathedral was designed in the baroque (enormously ornate) style by a scientist named Christopher Wren. A raging fire ate up all of London in 1666, so at the age of 31 this brilliant fellow became an architect, and designed 52 churches so London could replace the many it had lost. It felt very much like a smaller version of the Notre Dame from the inside -- the sort of place where you find yourself whispering without meaning to.
From there I took one of those big red double-decker buses to Tower Hill, where the juxtaposition of architectural styles and the density of buildings really showcases London's urban history. In the lower part of the wall in this picture you can see the slits through which archers fended off those attackers foolish enough to get into the moat at the base of the wall; the upper right-most part of the old brick is mostly dark but with patches of lighter colors owing to reconstruction after bombings in WWII; then there's that obvious, weird, phallic glass bit so very impossible not to notice above it all. It seems as though the city multiplied in a desperately haphazard manner, densely filling every available inch with a building. The history of the fortress itself can best be described as shockingly violent; more than 100 people were publicly executed in front of eager crowds, some of whom were so madly thrilled to see beheadings that they crushed and injured each other in the process. Apparently the upper-class prisoners were treated to private executions instead, and kept in their prison towers with retinues of servants.
My last stop was the British Museum, which is truly a wonderful place. This beautiful art -- does one call that a statue? a sculpture? -- stands in their atrium, which is indisputably another work of art. The museum is free and allows you to take pictures, both of which are an incredible gift.
It houses what is to me, as a linguist, the absolute Holy Grail: the Rosetta Stone itself. It's a large dark hunk of rock (looks like marble) with the same law carved in three different languages, one after the other. The first language is Egyptian hieroglyphics, the second a long-dead script called Demotic, and the third Greek. This allowed historical linguists to crack the code of Egyptian hieroglyphics, since by the time linguists came around, everyone who understood hieroglyphics was also long-dead.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Antiquity

There is a bell at the British Museum that is 100 times as old as I am. Not just 100 years old, which alone is sort of unfathomable in a practical sense (especially if you're Bigwig or Fiver), but 100 years for every 1 year of mine -- 3300 years old, shaped in the oldest bronzeworking culture of which the museum had evidence. Some time in the 13th century BC a metalworker in Southern China fashioned the large bell of hot metal, and since then it has slowly crept from deep brown to a mottled emerald green. Imagine what that man's creation has witnessed! Imagine that man himself; he lived before plastic, so he would have worn only things made from fiber, animal furs and wood -- in an age before grocery stores and doctors' offices, so he'd have been lucky to be as old as I am before the spirits took him. Long before bikes or cars, he would have seen only the land upon which he was born, perhaps several days' walking distance from it, equivalent to a person born in Boulder never seeing past the humanfarms of Westminster. Since there were no magazines or photographs when he lived, the only faces that could register as attractive or otherwise would be those with whom he actually interacted -- his sister, his mother, his cousins, his friends, his wife. With no television and no internet, the only lives he could compare to his own would be in his immediate environment: no one would have far more than him, no one far less.

What a different time that old bronze bell still breathes. How fleeting must seem the greatest, most epic of our tragedies and triumphs. A piece of metal crafted by hands like ours, by a mind like ours, in a world almost unthinkable to us -- that one man's work now rests behind glass in a museum that is visited by millions of people every month, reminding us that what we do may last. One man in an ancient village in Southwest China has set millions upon millions of others to thinking: maybe I too can make something with my time here that will outlast the millenia, change the world with my hands too in a way that will set millions upon millions to thinking...

Monday, May 19, 2008

Waterfalls, Old Shoes and Satisfaction

We hiked to two waterfalls. For the first one, we kayaked inland up Wailua River before hiking into the jungle. This is the same forest where Indiana Jones almost got stuck with darts at the very beginning of Raiders. It is easy to see why so many movies have been filmed here -- Kaua'i is covered with primeval forests, and they are both psychologically transporting and quite easy to get lost in. We did get lost on our way back -- only for 5 minutes, but they were my favorite 5 minutes. Our kayak matched the gorgeous blended colors of the most common flower in the trees -- and the Tevas I'm wearing are the same ones that took me through West Africa and down to southern Mexico. They belonged to Mom before me and are such good friends that taking them out of service would lessen the experience of travel. They're only a decade old; time to replace the velcro again and I'm sure they'll see me to another continent.

The second hike was much longer, took an entire day and involved no tour guide; definitely the more dramatic and satisfying of the two. We wore our bathingsuits and left the car at the end of the island's one big road. Brian is standing in front of the beach half way to the big falls, Hanakapi'ai. The cave with the breathtaking water is directly behind him in this shot. It was spooky -- the water was gorgeous as far as the sunlight reached, and then the cave was pitch black -- but the water continued through like a tunnel. You can sort of see it in this picture, but it was like swimming through a lava bubble -- floating on my back looking up at the black jagged angles of the ceiling, it was very easy to imagine the volcanic birth of the island. The edges seem so sharp, just barely weathered.
Very exciting -- enchanting, transporting, and now part of a memory already.

These beautiful columbine greeted us upon our return to our home, where after a day of confused exhaustion we are successfully recalibrating to life as normal. We will have been together 7 years as of tomorrow, 5/20/2008, and married 3 years as of 5/25. It was truly wonderful to dedicate a whole week to enjoying each other, with no obligations to distract us from that priority -- the greater challenge now is how to navigate work and life while maintaining the enjoyment of the connection.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Super dooper ultra fantastico -- no, really :o)

The last entry was two months ago -- with good reason. Since I last wrote, I made it into the CU Linguistics PhD program, signed up for the double PhD in Cognitive Science, and got a grant that pays my tuition for the next two years -- making a conversational database of Arapaho. The same grant is flying me to London in June to be trained in endangered language documentation at the University of London's School for Oriental and Asian Studies (oddly enough) -- my first international trip paid for by my career (which rocks). My first presentation at a professional linguistics conference was in April, and since then it's been a mad dash for May 9th, the last day of semester.

My semester ended ended a touch early because at 5am on May 9th Brian and I were waiting for the AB bus to DIA, to fly to Kaua'i, which is where we are now -- we finally are going on our honeymoon, and just in time for the 3rd anniversary of our elopement over lunch hour. Despite the enormous frustration of postponing the honeymoon for a dog surgery, a new air conditioner in a Colorado summer, a new clutch -- my new conclusion is that waiting 3 years after a wedding to celebrate intimacy via a week of utter relaxation may well be more productive (and certainly more... needed) 3 years late.

So there's what's going on, and here's what we've done so far:The view from our condo, compliments of our fantastic friend Nancy; a baby sea turtle swam right up to check me out while I snorkeled here yesterday.
















The ocean is amazingly meditative. This is the sunrise, right outside our condo, since the sun rises at 10am Colorado time.











Went snorkeling again down in Lihu'e, found some really... distinctive sunglasses.








And here's today, the Na Pali Coast where lots of movies were filmed. Spinner dolphins leaped in twisting arcs out of the bluest, clearest water I can remember seeing.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Reflections from the 42nd Mile Marker

My home is a silhouette of mountains.


They anchor my wanderings with constant orientation,

remind me gently in contours

that exactly where I am

is exactly where I am meant to be –


At the foot of Tolkeinite slopes of rock

while the rose-tinted blush of morning awakens stark against

the breath-taking depth of

Colorado sky.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Poem found in calligraphy practice papers

**If you're looking for Pi Memorization help, scroll down; it's below this post.

This poem was written long ago, pre-Finn, but was likely written with all thought given to its script rather than its content -- meaning it's not that substantial since the composer was rapt in the writing, practicing calligraphy. It was still pleasant to stumble across such a positive sentiment forgotten in the papers of my office this morning, however lacking in art it may be.

If it were but always so,
the whisper of summer in the trees
like 7th graders falling in love,

When the world is defined by
intensity and dizzying desire,

When the birds are so loud in the morning
that I wish through my dreams
that the window were open --

But somehow or other the
Earth is awakening in bloom and I
am set to aching by
the beauty of the Spring.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

How to Memorize Your Own Pi by 3/14

Numerical associations: where to start and why to start there

The more associations you link with any single idea, the more neuronal pathways there are to activating its representation again – the more different stimuli will bring it to mind. The web provides a perfect analogy. If you have a webpage but there are no links to it from other websites, it can only be accessed by entering its actual address (or value) in the browser; if 10 friends have links to your page from theirs, 11 different web addresses can lead to it – so it’s a whole lot easier to find. In the same way, knowing the value of a number gives you one association with it, posts it as your primary webpage so to speak; people with a disorder called Cognitive Synesthesia perceive numbers as being inherently colored, so they have two links to the number, both the value itself (like 5) and the color they associate with it (like blue). There are 5 kids in my family, so for me the number 5 can trigger thoughts of childhood. Lots of numbers make you think of other things, just arbitrary associations common to all of us that we’ve learned because we’re in this culture:

  • 666 – evil
  • 911 – an emergency
  • 9-eleven – the tragedy that occurred on that date
  • 7-eleven – a convenience store

Other such associations are specific to what demographic you hang out with.

  • 501 – Levi’s 501 Jeans (if you’re a child of the 80s)
  • 10-four – old buddy (if you’re a trucker)
  • to 86 something – to nix it, say no, I have no idea where this comes from
  • 42 – the Answer (if you’re into Life, the Universe and Everything)
  • 420 and 69 –very specific ideas entirely unrelated to the value of the numbers and generally not discussed in undergraduate classes (but understood by almost all undergraduates)

Unquestionably the best source for numbers with associations is your own life, though. Dates, ages, phone numbers present or past, zipcodes present or past – relevant to you or to anyone you know – those are all numbers with passive associations to ideas. All of the associations I have mentioned are passive because none of us ever said “the number 666 will from now on remind me of evil”. That would be an intentional, conscious, ‘explicit’ pairing, whereas passive associations are often unconscious or ‘implicit’, just made stronger by repetitive exposure. When two neuronal representations are activated at the same time, the connection between them grows stronger, so one representation ‘primes’ the activation of its match. That’s the premise underlying this whole game: the stronger the pairing between one idea and a second, the more quickly remembering that one will remind you of the second.

Diversify, diversify, diversify

That premise has a twin – the more representations that are linked, the easier it is to find any one of them. Different senses or “modalities” are a great way to create completely different links in your brain to the same representation. I have tried to recruit many regions of my brain to remember numbers instead of relying on the single strategy of semantic encoding (my term for putting meaning into numbers with idea association). Some of the other strategies are the following:

  • visual (recruits occipital cortex): color-coding ‘chunks’ by the value of the first digit; using a fixed presentation of digits for visual context clues learning it by practicing on a spreadsheet;
  • auditory (recruits temporal cortex): listening to my own voice repeating the sequence, listening to the same music starting at exactly the same place every time, pairing every number with a specific note and remembering the melody
  • spatial (recruits cortex distributed across regions): Melissa Dawe invented the famous Pi Samba in which she stands on the 5 of a number pad and the steps of the dance correspond to the locations of the numbers around her, with special flair thrown in when digits repeat.
  • kinetic/tactile (recruits motor and sensory cortex): just typing the numbers on a number pad (this is starting to work but I’m too slow at it for it to help much right now). The Pi Samba also recruits motor cortex for the movement to execute it, but the intermediate step of imagining where number keys would be in a hypothetical number pad makes the resulting representation in the motor cortex secondary to (so probably weaker than) the abstract spatial representation.

For me, semantic encoding is by far the strongest and easiest strategy, but I’ve always read a whole bunch, so stories come naturally in my head. If you’ve played the piano, the keypad method might encode more efficiently; if you do martial arts or dance, the Pi Samba might stick better; if you’re an artist, go with color or weird fonts.

I memorize Pi by first making my own passive associations explicit, so I have a conscious repertoire of numbers that stand for ideas, then bolstering that vocabulary with lots of intentional associations. Some numbers (like 75, the year I was born) refer to a noun (like me); some numbers (like 66) act like adjectives (30-66-47, me(30)-mad at (66)-my dad(47)), and a very few refer to verbs (to 86 something). Often a number like 82 will identify the time of my life that the next ideas refer to, like digits 121-130:

  • 85 – happened around 1985 when I was 10
  • 211 – my brother Jon, because the number that is really him (34) occurs right before 211 in digits 91-100
  • 0555 – three 5’s is childhood, childhood, childhood. 0 just hangs on, no meaning
  • 9 – great (trinity times trinity)

So 8521105559 means that around 1985 my brother Jon made my childhood better.

The next step is to reverse the passive association from number-to-idea and intentionally use the idea as a clue for the number. The hard part is relating the ideas triggered by the numbers in ways that make enough sense to remember. It is a very creative process. Once the original encoding is done, once I have ideas assigned to the numbers in such a way that each 10-digit chunk tells a story, then the continuous recall of the idea sequence becomes meditative – relaxing, centering. I cannot obsess about problems if I am concentrating fiercely on recreating the story from its trail of numerical clues.


Hints for Memorizing Pi

  1. How you encode it highly effects how you can remember it. If you memorize it on a keyboard, you can recreate it on a keyboard, but saying it out of your head without a screen in front of you is an entirely different act.
  2. Don’t repeat an error too many times. The more times you say the wrong thing, the more likely you are to say the same thing wrong next time.
  3. Weirder stories work better. They have to make enough sense to remember, but the more vivid they are, the easier they stick.
  4. Encode the minimum to recall the chunk. Only about 6 of every 10 numbers has a meaning in my own encoding – the rest of the digits just ‘hold on’ meaninglessly to a strongly-remembered number beside them.
  5. Different strategies create links from different parts of your brain. Color, visual structure, sound, movement, saying the numbers out loud vs. in your head, even reciting with your eyes open or closed – every difference results in slightly different neuronal activation, which buys you a couple more clues.
  6. Be creative in your associations so numbers can act like nouns, adjectives and verbs. If you remember the phone number of a childhood friend, that number could represent that era of your life, the personality characteristics of that friend, that friend themselves, the state you lived in when you knew them…
  7. Keep a pocket Pi in your pocket. It’ll be there next time you find yourself thinking about something you don’t want to be thinking about, waiting for the bus or in line at the bank, and if you’re following a trail of numerical clues to your own story, you can’t bum out about other stuff. Meditation on the fly.

To make your own, write numbers with no punctuation:

___________ Current cell phone

___________ home phone,

___________ parent’s phone

___________ current friend’s phone

___________ first childhood phone # you remember

___________ SS#

___________ Own Birth Date

___________ mom’s birth date

___________ dad’s birth date

___________ sibling’s birth date

___________ friend’s birth date

___________ Current house #

___________ current zip code

___________ Year of HS graduation

___________ Favorite/childhood locker combo

___________ shoesize

___________ ideal weight

___________ worst grade ever in a class

___________ score of most memorable sporting event you played in or watched

___________ channel you watch most often on TV

___________ radio station you listen to most often

Freebies:

  • #s w/ cultural meaning: 69, 420, 10-4, 911, 666, to 86 something, 007, 501 (Jeans), 42, 747 (plane), 13 (unlucky)
  • Decades: 30’s depression, 40s war, 50s innocence, 60s political hippies, 70s pot hippies/cool music, 80s cheesy music/childhood memories, 90s DINKland/memories/dotcom explosion, 00s life after HS (college for me)

Now decide the string of numbers you want to encode. Try to find instances where 2 or 3 numbers occur in the same sequence from the numbers you wrote of your own ideas. Once you have three ideas, glue them together with a story. That’s it!

In case you have fun with this, I always through a Pi Party on 3/14 every year. No one has taken me up on my memorization challenge. By all means, keep my email, and come over to eat round/spherical/cylindrical things and hang out with interesting weird people at my house next March. Good luck!

3…

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5820974944 5923078164 0628620899 8628034825 3421170679

8214808651 3282306647 0938446095 5058223172 5359408128

4811174502 8410270193 8521105559 6446229489 5493038196

4428810975 6659334461 2847564823 3786783165 2712019091

4564856692 3460348610 4543266482 1339360726 0249141273

7245870066 0631558817 4881520920 9628292540 9171536436

7892590360 0113305305 4882046652 1384146951 9415116094

3305727036 5759591953 0921861173 8193261179 3105118548

0744623799 6274956735 1885752724 8912279381 8301194912